(Lack of) Patience

So very, very often I feel like I'm failing at being the mother I really want to be. 

I want to be a fun, happy, chilled momma but instead I feel like I'm a bad tempered, irritable one. 

Today I really shouted at missy (on 2 separate occasions) which resulted in tears from both of us and now I'm feeling v.v.GUILTY...this isn't the kind of memory I want her remembering when she's a grown up 'oh my mum was always so cross. This one time she went mad just because I got chocolate on my new top...' 😕

I think it's been a combination of the summer holidays, a brain full of 'stuff' whizzing round my head, back to work dread and a very rainy bank holiday Monday that made me SHOUT today. But still....I need to lead by example. They say your children become who you are so be the person you want them to be (or words to that effect). I really need to start repeating this mantra on a daily basis! 

So kids, when you're grown up and reading this remember, your momma loves you both more than life. I'm so sorry if it felt like I always shouted at you and was often cross, bad tempered and irritable. I hope you remember the fun stuff and good times. There's lots more to come.

Xxxxx